Once upon a time, I only thought about staying in this country, where i was born and bred. Life wasn't too bad, or at least, i was conditioned to think that way.
But things somehow took a turn from i don't know when. Suddenly, i started to feel the crowdedness, unhappiness and sickness. And no, this sickness is not homesickness. It's a mental state where you start to get tired of how things are and consider migrating.
In the past 10 years, during my university days and working days, i had to travel during peak hours and squeeze on the train with inconsiderate commuters. People with no sense of personal space (i get it that we all need to rush for work but it's another thing to stubbornly shove your body inside a packed cabin), people with body odour and people who just have to keep their newspapers wide open. Of course, rush hour happens in every country but it's the people and culture that make your trip unpleasant.
Last year when i was in Japan, we boarded several crowded trains too. But the Japanese are so polite. They will apologise and make room for others. We observed that on a regular train, people do not 'fall asleep'. They almost always look alert, engaged in some form of reading and handphone using. You will never see someone putting their bags on the floor (i'm not referring to luggage bags). It's a culture thing and culture, like manners, cannot be revoluntionalised overnight.
Just last week, i was one of the unfortunate 250,000 who was caught in the train breakdown. Everyone on my train was let off at newton station and the bus stop was naturally crowded. People were even standing on the steps. When the buses came, i was literally elbowed and shoved, without a word of apology. Everyone's selfishness got the better of them. Although there were posts on kind Singaporeans and good deeds, really, are these people the majority of our make-up?
Yesterday when i was out on a public holiday, everywhere was crowded. Locals, foreigners, people. There were queues to every eating place and i got really crowd-sick. Not to mention the uncomfortable weather that our country is so famously known for.
Based on these experiences, i've been thinking, seeking opinions and re-thinking about my views on Singapore. Do i want to continue living here for the rest of my life? Do i have the choice to migrate? What's holding me back?
Rather than becoming one of those antipathic, complaining Singaporeans, getting away from the source of all these problems would be a better idea. i would like to believe that things would change for the better (i'm generally a positive person lol), but we all know that this is not going to happen and we just have to accept things the way they are. And at this point, Singapore has become quite unlivable for me. Already.
Of course, there are people (locals and migrants) who love our durian island. i may sound like an ungrateful child who has spread her wings and abandoned her parentage but, don't we all have the freedom to choose a place where we call home? Even Singaporean couples want to choose their HDB housing areas and units right?
While there is no perfect place in the world to live in, there are other factors that make all the difference. And being human, wouldn't we want a better life for ourselves if we have the chance to?
